Sporting Fools
Sporting Fools
Sporting Fools

Sporting Fools

The frequent and occasional humorous musings behind two of the World's greatest underappreciated sports minds.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Count the Reasons...

I'm not a huge fan of "number" columns/features. You know the ones -- "33 reasons the Trojans will win this season". More of the time they are written to be funny and fail.

But the people eat these things up so I'm giving away one more numbers column (besides the crap written by Dodd), this from Ed Barkowitz on the 50 things to watch for in '05 [Philly News].

Most of the column is written straight and it's kind of boring, but it's full of facts, which I can appreciate.
8 Trivia I: Can you name the six USC players who have won a Heisman?
Hint: All have come since 1965. Answer later.

Lemme guess. Hmmm The Juice, Charles White, Marcus Allen, Carson Palmer, Matt Leinart and....and.... Ricky Bell??
17 Answer I: Mike Garrett (1965), O.J. Simpson (1968), Charles White (1979), Marcus Allen (1981), Carson Palmer (2002) and Matt Leinart (2004) are the six USC players to have won a Heisman.

Uggh...Who cares about Mike Garrett anyway.

Well he hits on this Texas-Oklahoma game, which is supposed to be close this year for some reason...Maybe Mack Brown isn't coaching.
11 Texas will beat Oklahoma and end a 5-year (and very ugly) losing
streak to the Sooners; at least that's the prevailing thought down in Austin. "Texas has a fabulous team," Oklahoma offensive lineman Davin Joseph points out, "so if they're picked ahead of us, I won't argue. But the game still has to be played." Circle the date: Oct. 8. It's the 100th meeting of the two teams.


12 By the way, in the interest of political correctness, the colorful name of the OU-Texas game has changed from the Red River Shootout to the Red River Rivalry. Good grief.

Actually Red River Rivalry makes more sense to me. I wonder if SBC still sponsors the game. I remember they tried to pull that with OSU-Michigan last year, but OSU wouldn't have it. I guess it's hard enough saying "Bucks vs. Wolves" for those at tOSU, so "SBC presents Bucks vs. Wolves" would've been a two-credit class.
19 The most unusual offseason malady was contracted by Florida State
quarterback Wyatt Sexton, who will miss the season because of an dvanced case of Lyme disease. Bobby Bowden will rotate two redshirt freshmen - starter Drew Weatherford and Xavier Lee in relief - and said he will use whoever screws up the least. Gotta love Bobby Bowden.

Right now the over-under for Weatherford's consecutive series against Miami is four. And I'm guessing he'll have one first down in those four drives.
28 Trivia II: Derek Hagan is in line to break Arizona State's records for receptions, receiving yards and touchdowns. Which college football Hall of Famer and favorite target of former San Diego Chargers quarterback Dan Fouts currently holds those marks?

Hmmm it's either Charlie Joiner or Kellen "Senior Soldjah" Winslow. We'll go with the latter.
43 Answer II: The Arizona State receiving records Derek Hagan is chasing belong to John Jefferson.

Boy I suck at this.
31 One of the reverberations of Boston College's move to the ACC is that
the conference may someday soon play its postseason baseball tournament in Fenway Park and its basketball tournament at the TD Banknorth Garden, home of the Celtics.

Yeah, the former AIN'T gonna happen pal, not in my lifetime.
41 Clemson senior quarterback Charlie Whitehurst, who entered 2004 as a Heisman dark horse, will hope that new offensive coordinator Rob Spence (from Toledo) can reverse last season's dismal seven touchdown passes and 17 picks.

If Whitehurst entered the 2004 Heisman race as a darkhorse, he enters the 2005 Heisman race as a mule.
44 Urban Meyer's first order of business was restoring discipline within
Florida's program, a move that seems to have worked. "I don't know what kind of Florida Gator team you're going to see, but it's going to be crazy," said safety Jarvis Herring, a former troublemaker and now a team leader.

I love incriminating comments that aren't meant to be incriminating comments.
49 After watching its defense finish 117 out of 118, Hawaii hired former NFL coach Jerry Glanville as an associate head coach and defensive coordinator. His first assignment is Saturday against Southern Cal, where he'll find that NCAA can also stand for "No Chance At All."

Ok, THAT was funny.

50 The pick: Taking USC is too easy. The weight of the three-peat expectations and the loss of so many key assistant coaches is bound to catch up with the Trojans. These are college kids, after all. That's why the pick here is Texas over Michigan in a rematch of last year's Rose Bowl. If Roy Williams can win in hoops, Mack Brown can win on the gridiron.

What you forget is that the Tar Heels won in SPITE of Roy Williams. If Illinois connects on the open jumping in the final minute, they win. In college you can't win titles in spite of coaches.

Posted by TPrincess 1:57 PM ||
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